Celebrate the Season of Rebirth

Spring is an opportune time to clear away everything that is outmoded in your life to make room for what is new and fresh. For inspiration, look around you at nature’s eternal message of renewal: the trees, plants and flowers bursting forth from winter’s hibernation with joyful abandon. You don’t see nature holding itself back from blooming because it is programmed for change. Similarly, you are programmed to blossom. However, unlike trees, you are also programmed to fear the unknown, the chief barrier to growth.       

Growth is a difficult choice because it requires that you give up something before you experience a gain. For example, you believe you will be judged harshly if you make a mistake. Growth comes when you realize you are your harshest judge, and that most people do not expect perfection. But during the process of letting go of your old way of thinking, the anxiety can so intense you feel as though you are coming out of your skin. If you persevere through the discomfort until clarity sets you free from the past, you experience the exhilaration of rebirth.

Distractions Are Obstacles to Growth

A distraction is anything that keeps you from focusing on what needs your attention. This can be clutter, socializing, entanglement in family members’ problems, or self-destructive habits like smoking, drinking, overeating and overworking. Let’s focus on clutter, since that is the most obvious distraction to clear thinking.

When you live and work in a messy environment, your mind is distracted by the chaos. As Karen Kingston points out in her book, Clearing the Clutter with Feng Shui, this is because life force (chi) gets trapped in clutter, dust, and worn-out stuff. Kingston is not talking about the normal lived-in look of a home or workspace. She is referring to the disarray that symbolizes mental stagnation. Outdated, disorderly surroundings indicate that you are stuck somewhere in the past, like those popcorn plaster ceilings that were popular in the eighties. This could be because the time period you are clinging to represents a peak experience that you don’t want to leave behind, or a defeat you have yet to turn to your advantage, such as a divorce or some other painful trauma.         

By comparison, an environment that is clean, orderly and aesthetically pleasing needs no attention. Like a healthy body it is fine as it is, so you don’t have to think about it. Your mind is free to think about something else. But when the something else is what you are afraid to think about, hanging on to the clutter serves a purpose.

Imagine You Are Free

As an example of how a clutter-free environment can change the way you think, imagine that you wake up tomorrow morning and all you see is what you love and use. Everything is in its place; outdated possessions are donated or thrown away. You are caught up on chores and obligations, unconcerned about money and what others think; free to do what you really want to do. Notice the feelings that come up as you contemplate what you will do with the unstructured time.

You may feel excited as you think about the options you have not allowed yourself to consider. Or you could feel “scared to death,” as one of my clients said when I asked what she would do if she were not so busy filling her days. If so, the clutter and “have to do” pressure are distracting you from what scares you. The irony is what you fear to do is exactly what will make you feel happy and productive.  It is also what others may not want you to do because it takes attention away from them.

People Distractions

Some people in your life may accuse you of being selfish when you do what you want to do. A few will be honest enough to say they wish they had your courage. Or it may be you who feels selfish when you take care of your needs. Perhaps you are afraid you will fail at what you want to do, so you allow, even court, distractions. Or you believe it is noble to sacrifice your time, money and energy for others, including grown up children who prolong adolescence with their dependence on you, and friends and family members who complain but don’t do anything about their problems.

Selflessness is an admirable trait, the key to a fulfilling life, but unless you balance your needs with the needs of others you will feel tired and angry.

Embrace Growth

To embrace growth means that you are willing to go through the uncomfortable (and often embarrassing) stage of change until the transformation is complete. You remain open to the creative force that causes you to die a little each day in order to be reborn on the morrow. The people who care about you will be happy for you even when they don’t have your full attention. Some are inspired by your brave example. Those who care only about themselves will leave your life and move on to their next victim. You will feel sad when this happens, but if you accept the loss as necessary for your personal and professional growth, you will gain the confidence to take even more risks.

Nancy Anderson is a career and life consultant based in the San Francisco Bay Area and the author of the best selling career guide, Work with Passion, How to Do What You Love For a Living, and Work with Passion in Midlife and Beyond, Reach Your Full Potential and Make the Money You Need. Her website is workwithpassion.com.

 

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