One Lump or Two

By

I just recently turned 63. Not much different than turning 53, give or take a whole lot of wrinkles that have turned from surface lines to trenches. But mentally I don’t feel all that much older.

However, I have recently discovered that I am being lumped in with people I can’t relate to at all. I had a few minutes on my hand the other day so when an Internet survey popped up I thought, “What the hey? I’ll give it a whirl”. I put in my name, state, etc. Then there was a drop down menu for age. It was something like Under 19, 20-30, 30-40, 40-55, 55 and older. Wait, what? So now 55 and everyone else on the planet over that is lumped into the same group?

What cohort marketing segment does that make me? “Not hip enough to be concerned with her opinion?” “Don’t need your money Gramma?” Dang it, when did I slip off the face of the earth into the “Mostly-dead-cemetery-fodder zone”? You do realize that there are people 105 years old in my group? That means 50 years worth of folks are supposed to think, buy, and spend the same. And mostly that people in an entire 50 year spread don’t really count. And how in the world do they figure that people who were alive during WWII have the same views as people who protested the Viet Nam War? Do people who are twelve have the same buying habits of people 62?

In all fairness, I saw this day approaching when I went to a web page pull down bar a few months ago looking to enter my year of birth. The year I was born is 1951. It took me two pages to get to it.

I can see if it was a marketing firm representing mortgages for your first home, discounts on your first car, or for boots with five-inch heels. That aside, what is it you are selling that you think I don’t want? What is it you are selling that you think people 55 and up don’t buy? If we are grandparents we buy baby stuff. If we are athletic, we still buy skis, kayaks, and rollerblades.  

But to lump me with my mother’s generation for basic needs, music tastes, styles, vacation and travel preferences is not only highly annoying, it might get costly for companies who are not interested in the 80 million Baby Boomers who are still spending money on stuff.

Sally Franz is a former stand-up comedian, motivational speaker, and radio host. She is a twice-divorced mother of two and a grandmother of three. Sally has a degree in gerontology and several awards for humor writing. She is the author of "Scrambled Leggs: A Snarky Tale of Hospital Hooey,"and "The Baby Boomer's Guide to Menopause."