Time For A Deep Cleaning

By

Are you ready for some cleaning? Not the kind where you clean out your closet, wash your windows or freshen up your home accessories. I’m talking about DEEP cleaning! Clearing your mind, body and spirit of the limiting beliefs that are keeping you from reaching your full God-given potential, so you can move forward with a lightness in your step and joy in your heart.

There is no better time than today to begin a midlife cleanse! Begin with the “top toxins” that affect most midlife women.

CLEAR OUT THE GUILT OF SELF-CARE.

Most of us have been conditioned to believe that we must put the needs of others first, and that we cannot follow our own dreams because that would be selfish. With everyone and everything else on the top of our to-do list, we neglect to nourish our own mind, body and spirit. Even the thought of getting a pedicure or taking an afternoon off to play brings in a flood of guilt. Considering a much larger “gift” like leaving an unfulfilling career to start a new business is unthinkable!

Taking care of yourself should be at the top of your list, not the bottom. When you allow the needs of others to deplete your energy and joy, you are left exhausted, resentful, and depressed. When you focus on the things that are good for you, you will find greater energy and patience, and you will be a much more vibrant person.
ELIMINATE PERFECTIONISM.

Way too often, we compare ourselves to others, wishing we were smarter, younger, thinner, more successful, etc. etc. If you constantly try to be someone you’re not, you will end up exhausted, frustrated and unfulfilled. It’s time to let the authentic you stand out! Yes, it may be scary to put yourself out to the world as the real you, but that’s who the world really needs.

Instead of comparing your accomplishments to another’s, compare yourself you. Where were you five years ago? What have you accomplished? How have you grown personally and professionally? What positive changes have you made in your life? You are always becoming a newer, more improved version of yourself, so just strive to be the best YOU, and leave the comparisons behind.

Be grateful for what you have, love who you are, and don’t dwell on what you lack. Embracing “good enough” opens up vast spaces for greater joy, contentment and freedom to be the authentic self you were created to be.

WASH AWAY THE FEAR OF FAILURE.

The fear of failure can totally stifle change, keeping you in neutral, afraid to release the brake to begin your journey. If you are afraid of what MIGHT happen, or whose feelings you MIGHT hurt, you will be so consumed with worry that you can’t even take a baby step forward.

Ask yourself “What’s the worst that can happen?” If you fall down, how long will it really take to recover? Will it really matter a year from now? A small failure will be just a blip on the screen when you look back at your life five years from now.

Instead of imagining the worst outcome, visualize the BEST outcome! Are you willing to forego that best outcome because you are afraid to pursue it? If you let your fears win, you might miss out on one of the best experiences of your life. Trust God and where He is leading you, and know that, if you are seeking His guidance every day, He will equip you for every step.

REMOVE THE “BUCKET DIPPERS” FROM YOUR LIFE.

If you are like most women, there are friends in your life that, if given the chance to start over, you wouldn’t pick right now. Maybe they have been friends because they were the parents of your children’s friends, or perhaps those who you have served on committees with, or know from your professional life. You probably have people in your life who are always in the midst of some sort of drama, and you dread being around them.

There is a book, How Full is Your Bucket, that challenges us to consider who fills our bucket each day and who dips from it. Everyone needs to be filled with positive experiences and reinforcement—it goes both ways. When we are around people who “dip from our bucket,” our confidence and joy diminish. Likewise, when we dip form others’ buckets with our negative attitudes and talk, we make them feel small infuse frustration and sometimes anger in their lives. If we fill the buckets of those around us, then our buckets are filled too!

Make a list of the friends and family members who you spend time with, then note beside each one if they are a “Bucket Dipper” or a “Bucket Filler.” Begin setting boundaries to slowly move away from the Dippers, continue to pray for them as you feel led, but acknowledge that you cannot change them. Start surrounding yourself with more Fillers, knowing that you will become like those you spend the most time with. The more you are filled, the more you can give back!

REPLACE THE OLD WITH THE NEW.

The past is just that—past. It’s time to let go of things that aren’t energizing and uplifting, and to replace them with things that light up your life.

Don’t dwell on past failures, but instead look to the future with great expectations.
Learn to say “no” to opportunities that don’t support your God-planned purpose and goals, opening up time for you to say “yes” to things you truly want to do.

Trade your worry about what others think for the joy of creating a life that is pleasing to God, for that’s all that really matters in the end.

Susan Tolles is the founder of FlourishOverFifty.com, a life-coaching and inspirational website to help women on their life’s journey.